Another instant message conversation (March 2014):
Mom: not much
Mom: sup witchoo, mouse wrangler?
Bug: oh ya know
Bug: eating breakfast in my office
Bug: cause I had to shave my legs.
Mom: your logic is wonderfully understandable
Mom: which is both worrisome and magical at the same time!
Bug: why worrisome?
Bug: shaving my legs took longer than a normal shower
Bug: hence not enough time to enjoy breakfast at home
Bug: so I threw some oatmeal in a bowl, heated it up at work and bam, breakfast.
Mom: no no…the worrisome part is on me…that I understand your logic perfectly
Recent instant message conversation (March 2014):
Bug: I caught a mouse
Bug: and then accidently set him free in the l wing.
Bug: I was trying to find a vet tech person
Bug: in hopes they would have a humane solution
Bug: other than “kill it” or “put it outside in the freezing cold”
Mom: I have one of those high-pitch thingies in my office, anyway
Mom: no hearing mouse will come near me
Bug: but the deaf mice
Mom: yeah…I gotta watch out for them
Mom: the blind ones will likely get caught by the farmer’s wife
Bug: cause they’re dumb
Mom: wait…dumb are the non-speaking ones, right?
Shared on November 12, 2013
Wedding advice from Bug: Never, ever wear new lacy underpants on your wedding day. Regardless of what the Victoria’s Secret salesperson tells you. It’s just a really bad idea.
In a recent IM conversation with Bug about going to dinner that night:
Bug: and I didn’t mean anywhere fancy
Bug: dairy queen or culvers or steak n shake, whatever
Mom: but I got my Culver’s outfit on!
Mom: oh…you don’t consider that fancy?
Mom: I need to get out more.
Bug: well the amish do
Bug: we saw a whole bunch of em in there one night
Bug: then I fell off my bike
Bug: those two things are actually unrelated.
Bug: except that they happened on the same day
Mom: LOL LOL
He (sitting on edge of bed looking at prescription meds): What will happen if I don’t have my meds during the zombie apocalypse?
She (walking through bedroom, not missing a beat): I will miss you.
Via instant message on 3/29/2012 @ 9:34 a.m.
Bug: I’m wearing my super awesome zebra heels today
on an unrelated note, I also seem to be having trouble walking…
Mom: LOL “unrelated”?
Bug: probably unrelated stairs seems to worsen the issue
Mom: wait…don’t you work on the ground floor?
Bug: at work yes at home, I work on all the floors
Mom: oh…LOL but at home you can remove the shoes
Bug: …one of the rules for being a diva is you have to do housework in heels. I think.
Conversation in the car this past weekend (March 24, 2012) after talking about storms and tornadoes:
Mom: So, where do you and Jon go during a tornado warning since you don’t have a basement?
Mom: Oh, never mind…you’re in the street with a camera watching the tornado bear down on you, that’s right. That was a stupid question. Seriously…I can’t believe I asked you that.
Conversation in car this past weekend, talking about storms & tornadoes:
Dad: So, you like your new job?
Bug: Oh, yeah…it’s great!
Dad: What are your benefits like?
Bug: Well, I found out it’s called a “cafeteria plan”…in fact, when I was talking to HR and they mentioned “cafeteria plan” I was thinking “Oh, I wonder what day they have chicken nuggets?!?”
Instant Message conversation:
[Tue Feb 21 2012 12:49:43 PM] MOM: MOM is away
[Tue Feb 21 2012 12:54:15 PM] BUG: I want to know what your away msg says but the only way I can figure out how to see it is to send a message that I know you won’t see
[Tue Feb 21 2012 12:54:19 PM] BUG: ….
[Tue Feb 21 2012 12:54:24 PM] BUG: ok
[Tue Feb 21 2012 12:54:30 PM] BUG: that apparently doesn’t work
[Tue Feb 21 2012 12:54:33 PM] BUG: boo
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:00:23 PM] BUG: I had a pbj for lunch
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:00:26 PM] BUG: what’d you have for lunch?
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:00:31 PM] BUG: I keep tasting celery
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:00:35 PM] BUG: cause I had some celery earlier
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:00:41 PM] BUG: it’s kinda gross
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:00:47 PM] BUG: my butt feels weird today
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:00:54 PM] BUG: must be the chili we had for dinner last night
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:01:03 PM] BUG: that’s why I had pbj for lunch and not leftover chili
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:01:08 PM] BUG: cause it made me SUPER farty
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:01:17 PM] BUG: and I didn’t want to be farty at work
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:01:34 PM] BUG: trying to keep the offensiveness to a minimum
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:01:38 PM] BUG: they still like me so far
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:02:53 PM] MOM: MOM is online
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:03:05 PM] BUG: Dear Diary…I don’t need a diary
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:03:08 PM] BUG: I have a mom
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:03:28 PM] MOM: LOL LOL
[Tue Feb 21 2012 01:03:48 PM] MOM: I’m so glad that you can entertain yourself while I’m away
Via instant message on 02/16/2012 @ 8:42 a.m.
Bug: I burned instant coffee…
Mom: dare I ask how?